Unsolicited Advice

[ricevermicelli]

So, guys, remember back in January, when I told you all the if you only took one piece of advice from me ever it should be to not get what I had, which turned out to be pneumonia?

I may have been too specific. I need to make some additions.

OMG, you GUYS! DON'T GET CANCER! I only THOUGHT I was miserable with the pneumonia. I mean, I was, but at least I was sleeping okay.

My daughter goes around telling people that she never wants to have an operation. Last night, Danger Lad! and I had a conversation in which I had to reassure him that, while I think Paris is wonderful, he is not *required* to go there when he grows up, and he can stay home forever. Which is totally the place you expect the conversation to go when you've been reading him a bedtime story that involves Paris, and you mention that he might go there and see how awesome it is himself someday.

I have cards in my wallet that explain that, for medical reasons, I am somewhat metallic and also radioactive. Today I found out that the port placement resulted in a blood clot (which is why my neck hurts so damn much), and I get to inject myself twice a day with lovenox. The nurse looked guilty when she admitted that that could go on for as long as six months. And they haven't even started infusing me with toxic crud yet.

Comments

[steuard.livejournal.com]

On the bright side, there are worse ways than neck pain to find out that you've got a blood clot. Not that knowing so makes it any less unpleasant of an experience, I'm sure.

Maybe you can convince the kids that your radioactivity card means that you are now officially a superhero?

[zathrus.livejournal.com]

Or perhaps, the doctors are in the process of activating your superpowers? A long, annoying, drawn-out process, to be sure, but I would think the recovery process from being dropped in a vat of toxic waste would be even worse. (Yes, I know, the comic books don't depict it that way. They lie. They lie vilely.)

Paris really is awesome. I know this, of course, from following along vicariously through pictures posted on Facebook during my parents' trip there. Apparently, if you are not smart enough to visit Paris when you are young and poor, you get to go when you are middle-aged and poor from paying for your kids' college educations. Regardless, they had a blast, and now my kids have books about the awesomeness of Paris; perhaps they will break this generational stupidity and go when they are young and poor instead of waiting for middle-aged empty-nested poverty. I trust that their current fondness for home (and DL!'s) will someday be overcome by curiosity and/or a driving need for independence.

Newt

[beah.livejournal.com]

Unfair. I spit on cancer and clots and cards and crud for you.

[quueer.livejournal.com]

Tonight Vivian called me a liar when I said that the operation was to help you feel better. It was awesome.

And then Eeyore and Spiderman got married in the bath tub. Which has nothing to do with anything except for awesomeness.

[drwex]

Thank you for sharing that. I continue to tell our (older-than-Vivian) kids that they have great imaginations, though they don't produce such out-loud awesomeness as often anymore. I hope Vivian keeps it going a good long time.

[mizarchivist]

Lovenox, are you fucking kidding me? Someone needs to be slapped for calling any drug lovenox.
I agree. It's clear that you are in the process of superhero transformation. Just... no capes. Please.

Oy!

[sweetmmeblue.livejournal.com]

I don't have much to add other than you are in our thoughts. If there is anything we can do to help let us know.

[gosling.livejournal.com]

That radioactivity card should certainly be credential enough to officially prove you are a superhero, but I always secretly suspected you had superhero powers anyway.

[jesse-in-boston.livejournal.com]

In my mind Danger Lad! has not lost the musical pen I gave him yet, so you have background music of La Marseillaise during your Paris discussions.

[woodwardiocom.livejournal.com]

I am somewhat metallic and also radioactive.

Well, that explains a lot.

[damascene.livejournal.com]

I was really annoyed last summer when they finally broke it to me that the radiation didn't mean I could be my own reading light for a while.

Dammit about the blood clot; that's just insult to injury.