The Young Master Had His Cork Drawn

[ricevermicelli]

Danger Lad! managed to slip and fall, whack himself in the face with the infant safety nail clippers he was carrying around, slice up his lip and give himself a bloody nose.

He's fine - he howled a little, and then exercised his vocabulary ("Teef. Lips. Owwww.") and then protested bedtime. No one should make you go to bed when you have just been injured by a pair of infant! safety! nail clippers (nor should they do so at any other time). My nose aches a little in sympathy, and I suddenly feel much more understanding towards the people who buy toddler walking helmets.

The nail clippers say "Safety1st" on them.

Comments

[janetl.livejournal.com]

I once gave myself a nasty puncture wrestling massive staples out of a packet of Underwriters Laboratories safety certification paperwork. Oh, the irony.

[punkrockgrrrl.livejournal.com]

Once Petey had to have stitches from an incident involving a dental floss container.

[macthud]

The issue is clear.

Safety *Third*!

First, look good.
Second, have fun.
Third, be safe.

Careful attention to the first two should generally obviate attention to the third. ;-)

[c1.livejournal.com]

Lawsuit!!

[nemene.livejournal.com]

I think they would claim their is differnce between safe for us ON baby and safe for use BY baby...

[c1.livejournal.com]

Something the manufacturer should have forseen, and something that's worth bajillions in damages!!

[ricevermicelli.livejournal.com]

I'll take them to court for mental anguish, and the replacement of one set bloodstained footie pajamas. We'll be rich, I tell you!

[c1.livejournal.com]

And when the dust settles, they'll be left wondering what just hit them.
:)

[zathrus.livejournal.com]

T once ended up in the ER thanks to a collision with an infant safety gate. They were able to glue his eyebrow shut, and so we didn't have to sedate him to give him stitches. In spite of the head wound, he was the happiest person in the ER that night. (He mostly got the screaming over with at the house and on the way there, and being in the ER waiting room was much more fun than the going to bed he would otherwise have been doing.)

Newt

[ricevermicelli.livejournal.com]

I'm pretty sure we talked about our one evening at the OR - it was right at the beginning of September, I think it had a title like "The Fifty Dollar Orange Popsicle." Horrific bleeding, resolved by the time we reached the ER. They very kindly advised us to go home and have a glass of wine. They explained that they don't stitch up anything they don't have to - "We don't like to traumatize parents if we can help it." The intake report describes DL! as "calm and playful". The intake report does not describe his parents. "Blood-stained and shocky" would have been accurate.

[zathrus.livejournal.com]

I believe you. T's bleeding had likewise largely resolved by the time they saw it; if it hadn't been on his face, I think they might have decided that a bandage to keep it clean would suffice. I've gotten a bit more relaxed now than I was when D was tiny, but small bleeding children are still shocking.

Newt

I missed the "cork drawn" reference

[drwex]

But I sympathize with the tragedy. Not to mention the irony.

Re: I missed the "cork drawn" reference

[ricevermicelli.livejournal.com]

It's not a specific ref to anything, it's a very old euphemism. In British sporting slang (dating back to at least the eighteenth century), blood is sometimes referred to as "claret". Someone who's had his cork drawn has a bloody nose.

Re: I missed the "cork drawn" reference

[drwex]

Oh, neat! Thanks for that explanation.

[bookdivalia.livejournal.com]

Awww, poor schro.

But think of how much worse it would have been if he'd been carrying non-safety1st clippers! Catastrophe, I tell you, CATASTROPHE!